It can be challenging to determine what truly defines a good person, especially since people are complex and flawed. A good person isn't necessarily someone who is universally loved or admired, and even those we care about deeply may display selfish or harsh traits. These imperfections don't always prevent us from loving them. Similarly, someone who appears perfect might not be someone we truly connect with. Psychologist Julie Smith highlights this common misunderstanding: being loved by everyone does not equate to being a good person. Julie Smith, a psychologist, discusses this idea in a video posted on her Instagram account. She notes that many people mistakenly believe that trying to please everyone makes them good. However, she argues that this approach can actually hinder personal growth. A "people pleaser" is someone who consistently prioritizes the needs and desires of others over their own. They often say "yes" to everything, avoid expressing their true feelings, and make decisions based on the desire to please others rather than their own values. This behavior can create the illusion of being good, but Smith explains that it is not as simple as it seems. When someone's actions are driven by the fear of disapproval, their ability to do good is no longer in their control but is instead dictated by others' expectations. According to Smith, people who constantly try to please others often feel a lack of internal alignment. They may appear friendly and agreeable on the surface but feel lost, resentful, and disconnected from their own lives. Over time, the accumulated stress and frustration from constantly compromising one's needs can blur the line between good and bad behavior. Instead of trying to be good by meeting everyone's expectations, psychologist Rick Hanson suggests looking inward for goodness. In an article for Psychology Today, he explains that when individuals recognize their own inherent goodness, they are more likely to act in positive ways. This internal sense of goodness includes qualities like positive intentions, control over anger, compassion, kindness, perseverance, love, courage, generosity, patience, and the willingness to confront and acknowledge the truth. By cultivating these traits in ourselves, we are better equipped to foster goodness in the world around us.