In society, people with relational intelligence stand out through their speech. They know how to bring up appropriate topics and subtly avoid those that cause discomfort. The art of conversation fascinates. In his Essays, Montaigne encourages us on this matter: "The most fruitful and natural exercise of our mind, to my taste, is conversation. I find its use sweeter than any other action." However, around the corner of a conversation, some obstacles often hide. From inappropriate silences to implications that lead to misinterpretation: be careful not to fall into the traps of discussion. For experts, the topics mentioned are to be taken into account if one wants to master the art of conversation. Researchers from Columbia University have pointed out three themes instinctively avoided by people with high relational intelligence. Money: Talking about personal finances can create tension or make the interlocutor uncomfortable. Bringing up topics such as salary, expenses or debts can not only create comparisons but also foster a sense of insecurity in the other person. "People talk more easily about their sexuality than money," affirms Nicole Prieur, philosopher and psychotherapist. When the subject is brought up, they have a withdrawal movement that seems to mean: "How dare you?" This taboo is undoubtedly a religious heritage and a particularity of the French. But whether one wants it or not, money generates affects, conflicts. "Money is a subject that creates power relationships, which can generate a lot of guilt. It is not a matter of avoiding this subject at all costs with everyone but of choosing with whom and how to talk about it. Because if money remains taboo, it is necessary to mention it in a couple since 'talking about money is talking about love,' affirms Nicole Prieur." Physical appearance: Even when they are formulated in a kind manner, comments on appearance can be misinterpreted. In our modern societies obsessed with superficiality, preconceptions about physical appearance are harsh. When one knows the difficult relationship one can have with one's self-image, causing psychological disorders such as dysmorphophobia, comments on appearance only weaken the concern of the interlocutor to be constantly judged by the other. Comments on physical appearance, even flattering ones, can weaken self-esteem. The relationship with the body is often intimate and linked to deep insecurities. This type of comment fosters a culture of comparison and performance. Researchers from Columbia suggest that people with high social intelligence prefer to avoid focusing on physical appearance to focus on human qualities such as: creativity, generosity, humor, or intellectual curiosity. Gossip: Although gossip has a social role according to researchers at Rice University, in Houston, they often do more harm than good. Gossip is an indicator of a lack of self-esteem, affirms psychotherapist Isabelle Filliozat. The gossiping person has the impression of having nothing in him, affirms the specialist. His frustration leads him to spread gossip to feel more legitimate. The gossiping statement should most often be interpreted as a distress signal "because he considers that what he is going to tell about himself is not interesting," continues Isabelle Filliozat. Before gossiping, it is therefore better to question what pushes you to act in this way and keep in mind this wise Indian proverb: "Better to lie than to gossip." Same observation for people who tend to boast. People with high relational intelligence prefer to let their good deeds speak for themselves without seeking praise to strengthen their self-esteem. They thus create an environment conducive to healthy and respectful relationships. What to remember: The art of conversation is based on kindness and accuracy. People with high relational intelligence avoid topics likely to cause discomfort or rivalry: money, physical appearance, and gossip. Mastery of conversation is knowing how to choose your words, silences, and topics to promote authentic and balanced exchanges. More than a talent, it is a way of life based on listening, respect, and sincere curiosity about the other.