Del Amo's illness in a literary collection

Jean-Baptiste Del Amo recounts his long-term illness in his contribution to the literary collection Ma nuit au musée, which invites writers to spend a night in a museum and create a narrative based on that experience. The collection, first launched in 2018, includes works by authors such as Christian Boltanski and Jakuta Alikavazovic, who each used their museum visit as a starting point for their writing.

A chronic illness and its impact

Del Amo's condition, a hereditary chronic pancreatitis, has caused him significant pain and difficulty in daily life for over ten years. The illness makes swallowing food painful and leads to severe nighttime episodes, instilling a fear of dusk. Doctors only recently identified the condition, and Del Amo chose to spend the night in Madrid, visiting Francisco de Goya's Pinturas negras at the Prado Museum and then staying at the hermitage San Antonio de la Florida, where Goya created his frescoes.

A narrative shaped by suffering

Del Amo's text focuses not on the medical causes of Goya's illness—believed to include mercury poisoning or syphilis—but on how suffering is reflected in art and how his own condition becomes the central theme of his work. He writes in the second person, possibly to distance himself from the illness's power and make the writing more bearable.

Illness and the disruption of life

Del Amo explores how illness disrupts daily life, altering simple gestures and the rhythm of existence. He questions what a body weakened by pain can desire and how romantic relationships might be affected when the narrative of a relationship unravels, with each person living in a separate story.

Language and the search for expression

Del Amo argues that illness challenges language, requiring new forms to express what cannot be easily named. He notes that an unnamed illness creates a void in language, hindering thought and healing. Naming the illness, even if it cannot be cured, allows for a process of understanding and containment through language.

A fragmented narrative and artistic parallels

Del Amo anticipates his narrative will be fragmented, moving away from a clear chronology to reflect the splitting and dispersion caused by illness. He draws a parallel between the way we relate to Goya's altered paintings and his own experience, suggesting we may admire these works more for their changes over time than in their original state.

Rupture as a condition for storytelling

Del Amo finds a connection between the alteration of Goya's works and his own experience, using the concept of rupture—meaning break or fracture—to frame his narrative. He sees writing not just as a form of testimony but as a literary form that shares his suffering and solitude, transforming personal pain into a broader artistic expression.