When a child wants to do well, feels disappointed after making a mistake, or is striving to improve, it is not necessarily a problem. The challenge comes when this desire to perform well turns into excessive pressure. This pressure is not limited to children who are struggling academically; even high achievers can feel intense stress during exams. Cindy Felio explains that the key difference is in the cost of this pressure. A responsible child may want to do well, feel disappointed by an error, and then move on. However, when the pressure becomes too great, the stakes shift from academic performance to self-worth: "One can then move from 'I failed' to 'I am useless.'" Recognizing when academic pressure becomes too intense can be difficult. Some children may achieve excellent grades, making it seem from the outside that everything is fine. But internally, each evaluation can feel like a judgment on their abilities, value, or the position they believe they should hold. This can lead to emotional distress even when results are good. One sign that pressure has become too intense is when a child reacts strongly to an error or a bad grade. Cindy Felio notes that a particularly intense reaction—such as crying, anger, or harsh self-criticism—can indicate that the child is no longer viewing the grade as just feedback on a specific task but as a reflection of their self-worth. This reaction can be a signal that the pressure is becoming overwhelming. Another sign is when perfectionism begins to slow down a child's work. This can be misleading, as it may appear as diligence at first. Cindy Felio describes a child who constantly rechecks their work, erases answers, or avoids answering questions out of fear of making a mistake. While the desire to succeed is strong, this perfectionism can actually hinder progress. The fear of making a mistake becomes so intense that it interferes with the ability to complete tasks efficiently. The third sign is when school continues to occupy a child's mind even after they leave school. Cindy Felio explains that when a child is constantly thinking about upcoming tests or grades at home, during meals, or at bedtime, it can be a sign of excessive pressure. These children may anticipate exams, ruminate over mistakes, and ask for reassurance frequently. In some cases, physical symptoms such as stomachaches, headaches, or difficulty sleeping may also appear. To help a child release this pressure, parents can shift their approach to how they discuss results. Instead of focusing on mistakes or lost points, Cindy Felio suggests asking questions that promote reflection and learning. For example, asking, "What did you find difficult?" or "What would you do differently next time?" can encourage a more constructive mindset. She also recommends asking, "If your best friend had received this grade, what would you say to him?" This can help children recognize how much harsher they can be with themselves compared to how they would treat others, allowing them to be more gentle with themselves.