A person writing to The Independent's agony aunt, Victoria Richards, described feeling emotionally and physically drained from being the only caregiver for their aging parents, who are in their eighties and refuse to accept help or move into assisted living or residential care. The individual, an only child, explained that their parents are forgetful and experiencing declining abilities, yet still expect them to manage daily tasks such as shopping, paying bills, and responding to emergencies. The writer emphasized that they have their own life, including a demanding job, health issues, and children of their own, and that the distance between them and their parents adds to the stress and burden. The writer admitted to feeling guilty for their resentment and expressed a deep desire for an excuse to stop caring for their parents, even wishing for an illness or accident that would force their parents to accept help. They described the emotional struggle of trying to balance their responsibilities as a caregiver with their personal life, which has left them feeling overwhelmed and burnt out. Victoria Richards acknowledged the writer's feelings of exhaustion and highlighted the lack of adequate support available for carers in the country. She noted that the new prime minister has pledged to "overhaul" social care, which could bring about much-needed changes in the future. Richards encouraged the writer to set clear boundaries, visit their parents on specific days, and consider building a network of support from friends, family, or professionals. She also suggested that the writer might need to have a difficult but necessary conversation with their parents about the importance of seeking external professional help. Richards emphasized that while caregiving is a noble act, it is also essential for the caregiver to prioritize their well-being and seek assistance when needed.