Parents often try to ease a child's anxiety with reassurance, but psychologist Cindy Felio suggests listening and validating feelings instead.
Anxious child needs support not reassurance
When a child is anxious about an evaluation or school, parents often try to comfort them with phrases like "It will be fine." However, psychologist Cindy Felio says this can sometimes increase pressure instead of easing it.Understanding the child's feelings is key
Felio suggests that the child needs to feel heard and supported, rather than pressured to be fearless. Parents should acknowledge the difficulty the child is experiencing without immediately trying to convince them otherwise.First phrase helps validate the child's emotions
The first recommended phrase, "I see that it is difficult for you right now," allows the child to process their feelings without being forced to immediately adopt a more optimistic outlook.Second phrase helps identify the source of worry
The second phrase, "We will look together at what worries you the most," encourages the child to explore their anxiety with the parent's help, showing that they don't have to face it alone.Third phrase reassures the child about their worth
The third phrase, "You do not need to succeed at everything for me to be proud of you," is especially helpful for children who tie their self-worth to their performance. It reminds them that their value isn't defined by grades or achievements.
